Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Santa...jolly 'ol philanthropist or scary bearded sociopath?

Yes- it is in fact, the most wonderful time of the year....although I must say that Flag Day is creeping up to a really close second, especially since that one might be the only one that doesn't get taken over by either the retail market or the secular progressives...but I digress. But alas, during this hap hap happiest season of all, I have stumbled upon a bit of an issue which I admit, I did not see coming.

Even though my girls are very young (2 1/2 and 1 1/2 for those of you just tuning in), I worry for their safety. They are so friendly and trusting, made evident just recently by my eldest when, while our household goods were being delivered, I looked up and panicked when I realized she was out of my visual range. Thankfully, about five seconds later, I saw her coming down the stairs, HAND IN HAND with one of the movers. And so began the Stranger Danger Talk...

Fast forward to the night before our squadron children's Christmas party, when I'm sitting down, eldest daughter on my knee, happily explaining what would be her first encounter with 'Ol Saint Nick. Raise your hand if you see where this is going...

So, after I'd gone into great detail that she would be sitting on this man's lap, telling him her name, whether she's been naughty or nice and accepting whatever gift or possibly candy this "Santa Claus" would offer, I knew the exact thoughts brewing behind those round, espresso eyes.

and then came my stammering soliloquy...

"Ok Lady Bug, everything I've told you about strangers still goes. Don't talk to them. Except at Christmas time..well, only if it's a man and he is giving candy and, only if he's in a, when there are elves around? Crap. It's alright to sit on a strange man's lap if all of the other kids are doing, only the nice, only if you've been nice?? Crap. Only sit on the lap of of a man who is Santa Claus, although he won't have ID, because he's not real...I mean, he is real... but he will have left his ID in the sleigh... Crap. Only if you're at a mall and he's dressed up like Santa and there's a photographer and he's not holding a bell, and isn't asking for money and doesn't smell like alcohol...and only if he has kind eyes and can name all of his reindeer without hesitation. Crap... (clear throat) Honey, unless Mommy or Daddy say otherwise, don't talk to strangers... "

Luckily she's 2 1/2 and probably only caught the word "candy" out of the whole thing... or else she'll be having nightmares about said scary, red man coming down our chimney...

Thursday, October 9, 2008

The Campaigning Blues

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To Vote or Not to Vote-That is the question...

In honor of election season, I would like to submit to you all that it is not a right to vote. It is a privilege. And for women, a hard As I watch the news and the election updates, I am once again seeing a frantic race to "get out the vote, or "rock the vote," or whatever trendy little platitude that the campaigners/candidates/zealots/patriots have come up with at the time. In these times it is terribly easy to register. In some states you can register and vote on the same day...and they wonder why voter fraud runs rampant...but I digress... In light of this, I would like to commit to your consideration my top ten reasons that a person should not cast his/her vote in this election.

10- If you can't name the current president, vice president and speaker of the House (must be all three)

9- If you think that it is Obama bin Laden who is running for president

8- If you don't know at least a few main differences between socialism and capitalism

7- If you have ever watched any reality show involving Paris Hilton (One Night in Paris of course, doesn't count...that could possibly be nothing but morbid curiousity)

6- Your actual source of news and current events is any one or combination of the following:
Jon Stewart, The Colbert Report, Saturday Night Live, anything on the E! channel or any
show on MSNBC

5- You can't name all 50 states and know that Puerto Rico is a territory (come on people!)

4- You can't name the candidates on both tickets as well as their running mates as well as be able to know what office each currently holds

3- You can't name which war McCain was held a as POW

2- You can't name 3 U.S. allies

1- You didn't know there even was an election until you saw an ad on MySpace 2 days ago

Ladies and gentlemen, if you can't vote smartly, don't vote at all. The Tuesday night line up may not be great, but there are plenty of other things that you can certainly find to do.

Here's to the Elephants and the Donkeys!!
(if you don't know what that is in reference to, don't vote)

Thank you for you time.

Sunday, October 5, 2008

Eggs for sale (uterus and placenta not included)

Well, my dear friend (and by dear friend, I mean soul sister) informed me the other day that she was in the process of selling her eggs (and by eggs, I mean ovums, not farm fresh).

Since this information was passed on to me, I have actually been toiling over what that means in the big picture and what the ramifications would be more than I ever thought I would. Now if you knew this friend, you would know that she is just the type of person to give of herself, although not usually in such a literal manner. You know...the kind of girl who is there for you day or night, laughs with you, cries with you, votes in every election, always returns her grocery carts to those corrals, tips at least 15% even if the service was terrible. To give you one specific example, this is the same friend who just several weeks ago, spent at least 8 minutes trying to rescue drowning bees from my pool. Unfortunately, I was quicker at doing the drowning...

Therefore when she began telling me that she had found a way to help a family and also supplement her continuing education, I knew I would be proud and worried simultaneously.
Before I give any more details or opinions, I would be very interested to hear what those who read this blog feel and think about this. To narrow down your thoughts, here are my main questions that I have been pouring over.

1- how much are ones' eggs worth?
2- should it be anonymous?
3- if the procedure works, is that the donor's baby out there?
4- is it ok if the fertilized eggs that aren't used are frozen for use later?
5- wwjd- not to be corny, but how does this tie in with your faith?
6- would you do this?
7- if you have children, would your thoughts be different before you had them?
8- is it the same as sperm donation?

Thank you for your thoughts and opinions as I am really trying to work this out. After I receive some comments, I will finish the blog on my thoughts and what was agreed upon in the actual arrangement (assuming I have permission from said friend).

Wednesday, October 1, 2008

Greetings and bellybuttons

Well hello all...I've sure missed our chats. So, much has happened since we were last together, I'm scrambling to decide where to begin to catch up. I could take it from where we last left off and review the 14 hour flight with the two toddlers, the dog, the bags, the car seat, the stroller, the diaper bag and the purse...or I could move on to the weeks of living out of a suitcase, visiting family and friends we haven't seen...but instead, I believe I'll take it from my most recent excursion to the wonderful little town of Bountiful, Utah.

Just a few days after commenting to a friend on how much fun I am on a roadtrip, I found myself on said trip, from Montana to Arizona with my letters...J, M and O (thankfully Hammy opted out of this particular journey). There we were tooling right along, listening to Elmo describe in detail using the eloquent poetic prose that only a red monster could, to describe what he was thinking about that day, when we stopped for a quick fill-up and bladder drain when all of the sudden I had the WORST STOMACH PAIN.

Long story short, myself and the aforementioned letters, J, M, and O ended up touring the emergency room at Lakeview Hospital in Bountiful, Utah for several hours, an ultrasound, CT scan and various bloodtests to find out that I had an umbilical herniation (there was something caught in my belly button). Yep...emergency surgery on my belly button 2 days into a road trip. Who gets this stuff. Notice that I did not end the last statement with a question mark, but rather a period. It was said with a sigh at the end and not really as a question. I will say that after the letters scampered off to a hotel for the night, the nurse hooked me up to a morphene drip, I was rolled up to my own quiet room, void of distraction, children, demands, sticky fingers and responsibility, it might as well been the Turtle Bay Resort on the North Shore of Oahu. Frankly, I could have used a couple more nights in that place. And don't even get me started on the anesthesia... after that good sleep, I found myself thinking of other potential reasons I could give the surgeon for putting me under again.... do you think I need a vacation?

About 2 hours after I came to, the letters and I hopped back in the truck (and by "truck" I mean a huge, Ford F-250, 4-door Diesel-this detail really had no impact on the story, but I thought it was worth mentioning to those who really visualize as they read) and we were on the road once again. So, I think that it goes without saying, if you are ever planning a roadtrip...please keep me in mind.

So, with my bad back and now my bad front, I am trying to keep afloat with my two little ladies while J finishes his time on the sunny little penninsula of South Korea. Good Times.

The good news is that I now have my computer back, a home phone and a cell phone so please know that I will be ready to catch up to you...and you know who you are.

I've missed you. And it's good to back. In the USA, in my own home and with a repaired belly button. More soon.

P.S. For KS- I'll tell you more about the flight back, but just please tell me that when you cross the pond you are not going to be alone with the two boys. If so, MAKE A NEW PLAN.

Sunday, July 6, 2008

Orion's 1 !!!

My beautiful little, COMPLETE surprise has been with us for one whole year today! Well, actually I personally had her hanging around me for an additional 10 long and painful months before that, but I think you know what I mean. I could write so many things and recap so much that has happened with her, but instead I will share with you a wish and a prayer from me to

My sweet, little Orion Jai,

I wish you health and energy.
I wish you intelligence and grace.
I wish you passion.
I wish you sunny days and stormy nights.
I wish you early discipline and inner tenacity.
I wish you tender strength. I wish you true friends and easy solitude.
I wish you adventures and stability.
I wish you empathy and compassion.
I wish you creativity and logic.
I wish you successes you deserve and failures from which you can learn.
I wish you depth of character.
I wish you a zest for life and an appreciation for death.
I wish you wisdom.
I wish you faith.
I wish you everlasting love.
I wish you lots a
nd lots of laughter.

My dear, heavenly Father,

Thank You for this precious blessing for whom You've chosen me to raise and mother. I feel neither worthy nor adequately prepared for this awesome task. But I know that through You all things are possible and I will look to You and Your Word always for wisdom and guidance. Bless her. Keep her close to You always. Let her yearn for You and become a woman after Your own heart. Fill her with love and compassion and wisdom. Protect her body, mind and spirit from any and all things that are out to harm her. Let her learn from her mistakes and take other people's word on danger. Keep her close to her sister. Let them love each other without ceasing and be a spiritual encouragement to one another until they go to be with You. Show me how to love her and her how to love. Watch and protect her when I am unable.
Let her find You and know You and see You through me.

In Your Son's precious name,

My darling Orion,

I look at you and I couldn't love you any more. In Hebrew "Ori" means "my light". With your easy smile, you light up my life. I love you and I will always be your biggest fan. I am thrilled to have the privilege and honor of leading you on your journey.

Your Mom

Sunday, June 29, 2008

Flight 7859-Korean Airlines

Don't be on it. That's my advice to you if you have any hopes of staying sane or having an enjoyable flight whatsoever. This is the flight that I will be getting on in the very near future. Correction- myself, a one-year-old, a two-year-old and a little dog will soon be getting on that flight. Those of you who know me, understand that I am not a math person, but even I can tell that I will clearly be outnumbered to the point that either I or the rest of them will have to spend some/all of the flight drugged/drunk in order for us to arrive in one piece and possibly the remaining passengers as well. A friend mentioned that stickers kept her little guy busy in an airplane for a good 20-30 minutes... any tips for two kids for a 12 hour flight? Any at all? Is this mike even on?? You can get back to me...

Monday, June 23, 2008


no- i'm not pregnant for those of you who have bets going... if that were going to happen, it would have been 6 months ago. the news of today is... we'll be heading to tucson, arizona for our next assignment! if you're family and you like us, then you'll be happy-most of you live out west. if you're friends, you'll be happy because you are so dispersed, it doesn't make that much difference where we are to you! at any rate, compared to our current location- south korea (for those of you who are really out of touch) we are much closer to all of you! i'll be coming back stateside 25 july and jay will be coming home sometime between oct and dec.... one cannot keep track of that boy's comings and goings. so, now we know and so do you!

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Welcome-please put your coat in the back bedroom...

well, after much anticipation from myself as well as my friends who have been encouraging me to start this thing we go. numero uno. it's been difficult to jump into this, much like jumping into a preexisting double jump rope game. wait...wait...wait...NOW! no, NOW! no, wait... NOW! WHACK! WHACK! game over. this feeling comes from a few places, i suppose. although i'm a gregarious and outgoing person, i'm also extremely private and reclusive. that being said, putting my thoughts and feelings out for all to read makes me feel kinda...naked? and let me tell's cold out there! second, there seems to be a rumor out there that i am a talented writer...translation, great expectations. to put it simply, i write the way i think...sometimes it works... other times, not-so-much. finally, when so much has already happened which has formed who i am, where in the world do i begin? walk with me. on this journey, i'll be doing most of the talking, but please let me know what you think and feel... it's important to me and i would love your company.